Blogs of Note...

You see being a new blogger has its own advantages and disadvantages.The advantages are that even though i think that i am pathetic,my best friends support me and encourage me.I say 'thank you' in the most unsure way and i reaffirm myself saying that i am good.But,there is always this teeny weeny nagging sense that will not go away.

The disadvantages are that i just don't know what to write about..! Seriously..The mind goes blank and there is a constant voice in the back of the head shouting "I told you so..!!! You were NO GOOD " reminding me of a irritating teacher i had in school who was convinced i was a born criminal.

So in order to set my mind on what to write ,i browsed the internet and saw other blogs to see how they are constructed.As far as i noted every blog has a direction...And mine does not have any direction. i don't know where i am heading ,just like my life.While browsing,my browser got stuck in the Blogger Dashboard page and something caught my eye for the first time.If you see in the left corner there is a section which says BLOGS OF NOTE,presumably blogs that Blogger found interesting. I was like whoa...cool..

I went into my dream land.One of my distinct traits is that i think too much of myself. I started imagining MY blog featuring in that and getting lots of hits and regulars. (sheesh i kno it is lame...!! hey its a democratic country i have the right to think too much of myself.)Coming back to the Blogs of Note..i started to search how blogger puts it up...on what basis??? Sadly i couldn't find out.Also i searched if there is a shortcut to that list...tch tch..i couldn't find that too..or i assume it is not possible.

So i lay down my evil thoughts of taking the shortcut to Blogs of Note (i know it is impossible so i gave up ) and figure that the only way to make it there is by regularly posting.

Hey i finally came up with a new post...!!! Is this what blogging all about???Have i already crossed the novice land into the realm of professional blogging...!!!! Piece of cake...!! MUHAAAAA I AM KING...!!!! >:)

(i guess you know what i mean when i say i talk too much )

FRAANSHIPS...

The time now is around 1 am in the morning. I am bored to the core. Insomnia has gripped me for the past few months. I have to keep myself occupied….somehow I have to maintain my sanity ….books, movies, music and pointless roaming are my usual routines….besides pursuing these past times, I still have a lot of time to kill…..what do I do to fill in the huge voids of time….??? ORKUT…..what else…the one stop place for all those people who are bored and have nothing else worthwhile to do in life….ORKUT….

ORKUT ---The “happening” place...the best place for casual time pass…I agree that it helps to keep in touch with current friends and dig out long lost friends….But…I think orkut has helped me in providing me with good entertainment besides aiding me in keeping in touch with my friends. I will tell you how….

Mainly I use Orkut to see other peoples scrap books…(I am not ashamed…. :D) You see my intent is not to pry or invade their privacy (It is a public forum anyways…but still.. ) but to see all the “FRAANSHIP” requests….YES….this has been one of my favorite time pass in recent times…and I suggest you to try it too. The “FRAANSHIP” requests get innovative every time and funnier…These people give a damn to the explicit note which in the most blunt way says that the girl is not interested in “FRAANSHIPS”, yet the SEEKERS pursue their goal of “FRAANSHIP” in the virtual world relentlessly.

My Favorite “FRAANSHIP” Requests….

Please note the different spellings for friendship ..Errr.. “FRAANSHIP” in all the unique requests.

#“hi dude ...I am looking for some good friend ship with few beautiful girls around...If u think that u r one....do scrap me...”

Note the grammar…!!! This fellow is smart…he is putting the onus on the girl to send the friendship request if she thinks that she is beautiful…as if he is the desi version of Brad Pitt doing a favor for this poor girl by adding her…sheesh….what a loser…

#“hi howz u what do u do ,r u interested in frdship ,ya a stranger but even ur frds were strangers once ,just a decent frdship yaar ,hope u wil not mind”

Slick…good try….Sorry boss…..Your logic sucks big time…!!

#“hey...came across u in the common iyer community...msg pannalam nu thonichu...wassup..”

This type of “FRAANSHIP” requesters do an extensive research on the girl’s communities and find out about her interests and dislikes and “attack” on that.

#“hey wassup?? urs n my bday lies in same mnth...hehe;)...u ve got cute smile....neways m karan..n m frm jalandhar bt nowadays m in chenna as m in merchant navy....n m doin ma theoretical trainin hre...m sorry if i bothered u bt jus liked ur pro so repleid...i hope u wont mind”

GAWD…!!! DESPO NO 1…!!! Who the fuck cares about the birthday in the same month..!! as far as I know about a million people have their birthday on the same day…!!! This fellow thinks he is some unique snow flake and having special privilege to be her friend because they were born on the same month..!! And he ends with a slight note of “I am sorry I am usually a nice guy but now a full time despo out to seek out unsolicited fraanships“

#hey XXXX..........wanna chat with an army guy????

DUDE..!!! You should be a guarding our borders..!!! Not flirting around like this….GAWD..Orkut is a potential danger to the safety of the country…!!!

#hiiiiii add me please

When he faces rejection for a loooong time..The FRAANSHIP seeker resorts to begging…

#...YoU LuK SeXi In ThE Dp...I KnOw U WoNt RePlY To ThIs ScRaP BuT StIlL HaD To CoMpLiMeNt YoU ^_^...Tc

Slick try nah?? Working on the psyche to get a FRAANSHIP….!! He knows it won’t happen but still tries his luck...Relentless devotion to get FRAANSHIP….LMAO

#“hiiiii , i'm shajan. hmmmm, i think u r having some space in ur heart 4 a new frnd, being a shyful guy i'm asking can we be frnds????????”

A funny one..!!! this guy thinks he is a poet ..”Some space in heart” for a unknown online line profile which may in all possibilities be a rapist in a fake profile…gawd..LMAO……

The best part is he says he is a shy fella….but is still bold enough to send a FRAANSHIP request to a unknown girl…ROTFWL…

#hello........
who r u?

Clever jackass…..Scraps as if the girl has scrapped him first…builds up a conversation…and gets his FRAANSHIP eventually….

#Hi...i m not sure if the frst thing ppl wud notice bout u wun b ur glasses...i thin that subtle smile can take a person down hook,line and sinker.

but the frst thin i noticed bout ur profile is..its too simple .. may b the simple profile wud ward off potential frnds..but then...i think its attarctive in its own way.. chao!

BLAH BLAH BLAH……potential friends???!!! And what is CHAO???!!!

#hai i am joseph mario and this is my contact number if any one is intrested in joining my friends list can just send me sms or just a call i will be help full in all the ways ok

After years of FRAANSHIP requesting…..the SEEKERS get a bit arrogant of their success with gullible females and send out stuff like this..!! I was taken aback when I saw this scrap..GAWD…

#HEYY DEAR COOL AND VIEW MY PROFILE AND ADD ME IF U LIKE IT BUT BE FRANK

Errr…..what?? come again??? Do u speak E-N-G-L-I-S-H????

Well I guess you guys had fun reading the FRAANSHIP request…if you have seen any innovative requests do tell me about them.

I thank the girls in my friends list for providing me a new kind of entertainment and the content for this blog…

And to all the FRAANSHIP SEEKERS….continue guys…!!! ROCK ON…I LOVE YOU ALL….for the sheer entertainment you provide.

Ponder bout this while i take a trip to Kerala....

THE TIME MACHINE

"Why isn't my life like a situation comedy? Why don't I have a bunch of friends with nothing better to do but drop by and instigate wacky adventures? Why aren't my conversations peppered with spontaneous witticisms? Why don't my friends demonstrate heartfelt concern for my well being when I have problems? ...I gotta get my life some writers."

----Calvin & Hobbes

How true....how very very true....sometimes our lives become so monotonous that we tend to look for filling up the voids that are left in our lives towards movies and sitcoms.This is the reason why some people enjoy some movies and some simply rubbish them.(but this doesn't give the reason how one can enjoy a Vijay movie...anyone in their stable mind wouldn't do this mistake).

Anyways this is not about Vijay or his movies(it might bout them in the future blogs ;) )..but about one of the greatest comic strips(at least according to me) CALVIN AND HOBBES.Bill Watterson plays on one simple thing and got his comic to be a raging hit.He cashes in on the fact that there is always a kid in us...a small six year old always living in us even if we are sixty...

Reading through a strip every day kick starts it.Subtle humor,wit,digs at the society and most of all the pure innocence of Calvin.One can easily relate to the "TRANSMORGIFIER" ,"THE TIME MACHINE" etc..i have had my fantasies with such devices and i am not ashamed to tell that i still do.

I bet every single one of us would love to go back to that age of innocence when life is a lot more fun when you are not responsible for your actions.ahaaaaa wishing for "THE TIME MACHINE" right now. i have seriously pondered with this fantasy,thinking that if only i could go back to Einstein's time and pass of the "Theory of Relativity" as mine and be world famous..or just go back in time and become a Nostradamus sorts..predict all the WW,the famous assassination's,the next US president,the course of history and be etched in history forever.When i was 16 my dad told me that a ground(12 cents) in Mylapore cost only 1000 bucks....i again fantasized on my TIME MACHINE wishing i was back in 1950's investing in huge amounts in real estate and selling them off for millions in 2000 and living lazily for the rest of my life.... :D

5 whacky things i would do if i had "THE TIME MACHINE"

5) Eliminate Karunanidhi ,Jaya and Ramadoss---GOD..!! i have had enough of their bickering and fighting,politics and their god forsaken channels..the public would be free of SUN TV and JAYA TV and Ramadoss's metal ideas on social reforms.

4)Torture and Kill Radhika (the 'Chitti' bitch who started the Mega Serial trend in tamil nadu) so that i can watch TV peacefully without my folks nagging me to relinquish my favorite cartoons so that they can watch all the soaps.

3)Categorically eliminate all the BOYBANDS ,like Hitler's "FINAL SOLUTION" ,so that everyone can listen to PINK FLOYD..!! .I would inject them with a special kind of virus so that they would suffer a debilitating brain aneurysm...

2) Persuade Jennifer Aniston to continue with F.R.I.E.N.D.S ...dammit...i miss the show very much.

1)Prevent Silk Smitha from committing suicide...It was such a heart break for me. i did not know about the bees and birds when she was alive and when i knew she just wasn't around to share it with ,me :(


weird....... most of my wishes were to kill and eliminate... :D unworthy of the six year old in me... bah...who cares i was a violent six year old...and probably still..

what would be your whacky thing if you got the TIME MACHINE??? comment.

Ending with one of my favorite Calvin Quote..


I think life should be more like tv. I think all of life's problems ought to be solved in 30 minutes with simple homilies, don't you? I think weight and oral hygiene ought to be our biggest concerns. I think we should all have powerful, high-paying jobs, and everyone should drive fancy sports cars. All our desires should be instantly gratified. Women should always wear tight clothes, and men should carry powerful handguns. Life overall should be more glamorous, thrill-packed, and filled with applause, don't you think?

:D

Picture Of the Day

SAD BUT TRUE....What the heck...!! V are built that way..!!

Man's Greatest Invention...

What is man's greatest invention?? Some would say "the wheel" some would say " the computer"... As an average human being i would say it would be the CIGARETTE..It gives me absolute pleasure at a minimum investment and i can do it alone,that is the best part about cigarettes....they are the best when you are alone.Enjoying one's solace with a pack is the best.

Early days people used to chew tobacco..what made man roll it up in a paper and put a cotton filter in one end and smoke it?? That is what i call as " the moment of brilliance".I do not know who came up with such a idea...But dude...hats off...great work..

People always bullshit about the ill effects of smoking....but hey...I'd rather smoke my way out rather than somebody else do it for me...

Coming to the picture....a comic strip i found on the net..forgot the name..but makes awesome fuckin sense.There are a whole bunch of weird smokers I've come across.


TYPES OF WEIRD SMOKERS


1. "my lips might burn if i hold it for too long " :: These people are basically fakers,pussies,..they smoke...tch tch..I'd rather say they HOLD a cigarette just to look "cool" and are fundamentally retarded.The cigarette is never smoked,sadly...they are burnt...

2. "Suckers" :: These people are the worst,they have a weird affinity to the filter in the cigarette and their tongues are all over the filter making it soggy with their saliva.They never have to stub their cigarettes,by the time the fire comes to the filter it is naturally extinguished by the dripping saliva.

STATUTORY WARNING::: Never take a Drag from a "Sucker".You might as well go without it.

3. "I eat Smoke" :: Another typical example of a wannabe...These people are slightly different from TYPE 1...they take a quite a long drag that u will be surprised by their lung power.....after the drag,You can actually see them swallow it..!! and bring some of the smoke out...Using their stomach to smoke..!!.these set of people will be the first cases in the word to die of stomach cancer due to smoking.No clue what they get from that...Prolly they are friggin hungry to do that...but....my question is why waste a cigarette if you are hungry..??


4. "Uhhuh....Where did it go?? " :: The funniest of them all..My favorite time pass is to look out for guys like this and spend my time seeing their antics....See...i have never been able to figure out how these guys do it...they light up a cigarette....take a drag...or atleast i think they take a drag...and den blow out AIR..!!! No smoke...nothing...jus air..and they will seem pretty happy about t....having a face that will almost reflect that they enjoy doing this stupid stunt...




If you know any other types..pls do lemme know...i ve to find out why they do it.?? One can find out "Why the chicken crossed the road" but this will remain a unsolvable mystery.....


and for all those non-smokers...

read in tamil....

" agni enbathu gyanathin adayalam....buthi saali than pugai vida mudiyum "

----- a dialog from Katrathu Tamil (Tamil M.A)

rough translation::: fire is the identity of wisdom...so only a wise man can smoke...

Rules of Combat:

i found this in the internet.


Rules Of Combat.... pretty cool...read on..


If the enemy is in range, so are you.

Incoming fire has the right of way.

Don't look conspicuous, it draws fire.

There is always a way.

The easy way is always mined.

Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.

Professionals are predictable, it's the amateurs that are dangerous.

The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions, when you're ready for them, and when you're not ready for them.

Teamwork is essential, it gives them someone else to shoot at.

If you can't remember, the claymore is pointed at you.

The enemy diversion you have been ignoring will be the main attack.

A "sucking chest wound" is natures way of telling you to slow down.

If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush.

Never draw fire, it irritates everyone around you.

Anything you do can get you shot, including nothing.

Make it tough enough for the enemy to get in and you won't be able to get out.

Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself.

If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in a combat zone.

When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy.

Never forget that your weapon is made by the lowest bidder.

The Triumph of Bullshit....

u see...currently i am so bored that i have decided to do somethin that is useful and gives me a chance to kill time .....so i ve started with this bullshit..ahhhh...the second most used word after de F word...wanna kno de orgin...t was coined up by on of the most famous poets in our era...T.S Elliot...

and this is the poem which started t all...


Ladies, on whom my attentions have waited
If you consider my merits are small
Etiolated, alembicated,
Orotund, tasteless, fantastical,
Monotonous, crotchety, constipated,
Impotent galamatias
Affected, possibly imitated,
For Christ's sake stick it up your ass

Ladies, who find my intentions ridiculous
Awkward insipid and horribly gauche
Pompous, pretentious, ineptly meticulous
Dull as the heart of an unbaked brioche
Floundering versicles feebly versiculous
Often attenuate, frequently crass
Attempts at emotions that turn isiculous,
For Christ's sake stick it up your ass.

Ladies who think me unduly vociferous
Amiable cabotin making a noise
That people may cry out "this stuff is too stiff for us" -
Ingenuous child with a box of new toys
Toy lions carnivorous, cannons fumiferous
Engines vaporous - all this will pass;
Quite innocent - "he only wants to make shiver us."
For Christ's sake stick it up your ass.

And when thyself with silver foot shalt pass
Among the Theories scattered on the grass
Take up my good intentions with the rest
And then for Christ's sake stick them up your ass.

cool right....i wonder how t will sound if Cobain tunes to these lyrics... :D

well thats bout t fer de first post.....u got to kno a lotta bullshit....useful right????